Season 2005-06
January 2006 February 2006 March 2006
LOYALTY Submitted on 28/02/2006 by Trapper
Loyalty is a word that has been the subject of some debate on the Ceefax letters page of late, following Big Al’s feat of beating “Wor Jackie’s” goal scoring record for the toon, including some muppet from West Brom raving about the loyalty of an instantly forgettable player by the name of ….. see I’ve forgotten already ( I think he was called Tony Brown, but I stand to be corrected.) However remaining at one club ‘cos no-one else was ever interested in buying you isn’t really loyalty.

Loyalty may be shunning the self proclaimed “biggest club in the world”, it may be turning down the absolute crème de la crème of European champions (Barcelona, Juventus, Inter etc) to play for your home town club and win fcuk all.

No, I think loyalty might even be better demonstrated by Greeny’s devotion to Tesco - he would rather spend five minutes travelling to get there, 20 minutes queuing to get in, half an hour at the check-out, another five to travel back home again just to get another club-card point rather than buying a loaf of bread from the Co-op.

However my vote for the ultimate show of loyalty goes to SMIKE for his long running love affair with REG VARDY, proud sponsors of the dirty peg sellers. Yes, he’s bought another vehicle from them, shunning Honest Mick the Mag (the Cajun Arthur Daley).
And yet again he proudly flies the Mackem logo for all to see, not a Carrville Mags sticker to be seen!
However even his loyalty must be at breaking point, he didn’t get a spare wheel with his people carrier (he only found out when he drove into a ditch and buckled one of the four he did get, resulting in a two hour wait for the AA) and now the service-due warning light has come on, and he’s only had it two minutes.
 MATCH REPORT . . . Newcastle United 2-0 Everton Submitted on 28/02/2006 by Greavsie
We Love You Nobby......!!

After spending most of Friday and Saturday morning trying to rearrange train tickets for the Charlton trip, it made a pleasant change to get to the pub, have a couple of pints, and get back to the usual banter of matchdays. Come to think of it, I've seen more of you lot over the past couple of weeks than I have of the wife & kids. Don't we play away games anymore?

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Charlton Away. Submitted on 26/02/2006 by Smike
Despite the best efforts of those clueless twads at the F.A. to completely scupper plans for the trip to Charlton, we’ve managed to get sorted – eventually!

As the game has now been switched from Sat 25th to Sun 26th March the day return train tickets for the Saturday are obviously no longer any good: so there’ll be no day trip. However, Greavsie has managed to alter train times for the overnight trip (at an extra cost of course). Contact either him or me to confirm cost and train times. Accommodation arrangements are yet to be confirmed/finalised.

Special thanks must go to Carl from Crook for his efforts to provide affordable train travel, Greavsie for the hassle of having to rearrange the train times for the ‘overnighter’ and of course Joanne and Beat for resolving match ticket problems.

Once again not the slightest consideration from the idiots at the F.A for the fans.
 RESULT . . . Newcastle United 2-0 Everton     more . . . Submitted on 25/02/2006
Penrith - the place to be? Submitted on 25/02/2006 by Trapper
Spot The Carrville Mags! Submitted on 23/02/2006 by Smike
See if you can spot any Carrville Mags in this photo that appeared in the Evening Chronicle shortly after the Cheltenham game.

Click the image to enlarge.
 RESULT . . . Newcastle United 0-0 Charlton Athletic     more . . . Submitted on 22/02/2006
Odds on favourite. . . Submitted on 20/02/2006 by Beat
Interesting odds on the new manager here.
 MATCH REPORT . . . Newcastle United 1-0 Southampton Submitted on 20/02/2006 by Sean
So at last I get to report on a match without the dreaded ‘Sou’ at the helm, what a relief it has been since he went, around the pubs and the ground it’s like a weight has been lifted from everyone. So when Smike texted me on Friday night to take responsibility for the FA Cup tie with Southampton, I was elated, certain progression and maybe a few goals and some exciting footy.

Then it dawned on me that it was Keiron’s birthday and we were going through early and with kick off set at 5.40pm it meant a ‘loose’ report could be expected at best.

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Chelsea in the cup! Submitted on 20/02/2006 by Stevie
It`s Chelsea away in the FA Cup quarter finals. We`ve beaten them before, we`ll do it again.
 RESULT . . . Newcastle United 1-0 Southampton     more . . . Submitted on 19/02/2006
Mugs Not Mags? Submitted on 17/02/2006 by Dirk
The Club is organising Shearer's testimonial match against Celtic on Thursday the 11th of May. 2 days before the FA Cup final. They are saying that (in the unlikely event) if Newcastle reaches the final that Testimonial game has to be changed. How inconvenient would it be should we reach the final? How can they make arrangements if we are still in the competition? What are they expecting? That we are not getting to the final, or are they not bothered? If they are not bothered why should we be? Do they expect Southampton to beat us at home? Next round is the quarterfinal! What's the point going to the Southampton game, if the club is not believing that they can go all the way to the final? With no Arsenal, Tottenham and either Liverpool or Man Utd left, there is a high chance that the final will not be Chelsea vs Liverpool or Man Utd. Have they forgotten that we did beat Chelsea last season in this competition?

The Club is taking the pi$$! No ambition at all; they’re only out for a few bucks. We must be mugs, not Mags!
 MATCH REPORT . . . Aston Villa 1-2 Newcastle United Submitted on 15/02/2006 by Dirk
Tickets Up £5, Pub Entry Up To £2!
This weekend a trip to Birmingham was on the fixture list. Quite a nice trip from London, but probably not so from the North East. I was looking forward to this away match. The last time we played there was still under Bobby Robson. It was Robson's last game. This time is was Glen Roeders second game and we had another manager in between.

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Fingers Fix? Submitted on 15/02/2006 by Smike
Everyone’s favourite band, Stiff Little Fingers, are due in the North East in March for their annual visit!

Unfortunately the news is that former Jam bassist, Bruce Foxton has left the band. However all is not lost because Brucie is to be replaced by original band member Ali McMordie.

'The situation is amicable' says Foxton. 'I have enjoyed my time with Jake, Ian and Steve and will miss them. Naturally I wish them all continued success and hope to catch up with the boys during their spring tour."
No More Of That.
Said lead singer, Jake Burns, "Having Ali kindly re-arrange his schedule to help us out is fantastic and we all are looking forward to working together."
Back When He Was Younger.
The new line-up will play their first gig at Middlesboro Town Hall on Wed 15th March and tickets are available on 01642 242561 (box office). It’s OK Colin, I’ve just checked and this is NOT the ‘phone number for Whitehaven Town Hall. It would be a shame not to go wouldn’t it?

The following Saturday night, 18th March (night before Liverpool at home) SLF will be playing their annual gig in Newcastle. This year they are to play at The Carling Academy which is a bigger venue. However this means that Dave at Concepts is not selling tickets so I cannot get a job lot. You can get your own tickets from The Carling Academy on Westgate Road, by ‘phoning the box office on 0905 020 3999 or from www.ticketweb.co.uk. Support for the Toon gig is Irish Pink Band Blood and Whiskey.

Let me know as soon as you get tickets so that I can book appropriate sized buses.

While were on the subject, The Kicks are playing at The Star on Westgate Road after the Bolton game on Sat 4th March, anyone fancy staying through?
 RESULT . . . Aston Villa 1-2 Newcastle United     more . . . Submitted on 11/02/2006
 MATCH REPORT . . . Manchester City 3-0 Newcastle United Submitted on 08/02/2006 by Ian Gibson
Manchester Blues

Gary and James picked me up at half past three. I was well prepared for my task ahead (with my new note pad and pencil), but quite nervous at the prospect of making my debut as a match reporter for the Carrville Mags. I was a little lonely in the back of Gary’s car without my two usual partners in crime, Lee and Johnathon. As usual though I was full of confidence ahead of the match, with thoughts of Shearer making history, a win to kick start our push for a European spot and a trip to Wembley after our favourable cup draw.

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 MATCH REPORT . . . Newcastle United 2-0 Portsmouth Submitted on 06/02/2006 by Johna
SHEAR RELIEF

At the start of the season Portsmouth at home would not have appeared to be a glamorous must see game but given our current predicament, it actually turned out to be quite a memorable day.

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Quiet Lad`s Website Submitted on 05/02/2006 by Stevie
Sean has asked me to point out that his band`s website has moved here
Chop Souey!!! Submitted on 02/02/2006 by BBC
From the BBC:

Newcastle boss Graeme Souness has been sacked and temporarily replaced by Glenn Roeder and Alan Shearer for Saturday's match against Portsmouth.

The Magpies have won only one point in six Premiership matches and are only six points above the relegation zone.

A statement on the club's website read: "The employment of Graeme Souness has been terminated with immediate effect."

Souness, 52, took charge of Newcastle in September 2004 after Sir Bobby Robson was sacked.

His 16-month tenure at St James' Park was a rollercoaster ride.

With only 36 victories in his 83 matches, the pressure was almost always on Souness - and the 3-0 defeat by Manchester City on Wednesday proved the final straw.

Magpies fans protested at the match by displaying a 'Souness Out' banner during their side's woeful display at Eastlands.

But Souness vowed to stay on, saying: "I am not a quitter and will not quit."

For much of his reign, Souness was hampered by injuries to key players - but he also spent over £47m on players.

The biggest arrival was that of England striker Michael Owen. However, he also became another player on the club's treatment table.

It will now - at least in the immediate future - be up to Roeder, as caretaker manager to try and revive the struggling Tyneside giants.

He will be assisted by Magpies' skipper Shearer, who is playing his last season before retiring.

Former England striker Shearer has made no secret of his desire to one day take over as Newcastle boss.

Also in the frame is Bolton manager Sam Allardyce, who turned down the job before it was offered to Souness but has continued to be linked with the post.

A spokesman for Bolton said: "We've got no comment to make. Sam has got a job to do here and is under contract."
ENOUGH IS ENOUGH Submitted on 01/02/2006 by Johna
Each morning I wake up and walk downstairs full of excitement and trepidation. Has he done it yet? Could it really be Christmas again?

Switch on BBC, teletext page 302 ….check the headlines…$hit no news there….try ITV page 401……fcuk nothing better there….wait a minute maybe the terrestrial channels are behind Sky……check out Sky Sports Good Morning sports fans…….%ugger …that useless tw@t is still in charge

“ I won’t walk away” …arrogant sod…who gives him the right to decide whether he does or does not. Freddy get a grip and sort this out enough is enough.

But wait….we have our injury problem…I think the tea boy badly blistered his fingers last week making Saunders, McDermott, Murray and Tunks cups of tea to keep them warm on the training ground. Can’t have them running around and coaching…they might get injured (by the way…strong rumours that Shay Given is now taking his own coaching staff in!!!!!!).

We cannot therefore expect good performances until his blisters heal…after all he is to blame for the lack of tactics…we can only play long ball…lack of width….midfielders have got to bunch up and work hard to make it difficult for the other side to get past…whoops forgot about that sprightly up and coming Sinclair lad from Man City …looks one for the future…had a field day down our left flank. Then again it was unfair…after all they had two teenage strikers blessed with ability up front for them…France’s centre half would have them in his pocket…surely.

Let’s not mention the complete lack of fight and team spirit…this has been knocked out of them by Souness and his merry men…where are our characters now? Where is that fight and will to win??

Anyway back to serious issues…who is actually still missing that would get a first team shirt? Taylor and Owen without doubt possibly Dyer. Will they really make that much of a difference?

Luque….how the hell can we sign a player for £9.5m and keep him on the bench (against Cheltenham!!!!!!!!! For fck sake fcking Cheltenham!!!!). Another Spanish flop??? If he is that good a player…3rd best striker in Spain…..there must be a whole load of class waiting to burst out..but whether we will ever see it is debatable. The fastest I have seen him run was off the pitch to the tunnel last week.

Boumsong….words fail me, I just don’t know where to start. At this rate we are better of blooding someone like Edgar or Huntingdon who have both impressed for the ressies this year.

Anway enough of my rant …my fingers are hurting and the keyboard is smashed…I still have not learnt that you type any quicker if you hit the keys with venom and passion cos you FCKING CARE SO FCKIN MUCH!!!!!

This man will take us down unless something changes and soon…3 points against Portsmouth are an absolute must. Anything less and he has to go on Saturday night. One concern…did we payroll Owen’s move on the back of European football…”4th place is the minimum” stated Shepherd. Will that decision live to haunt us? No don’t worry, Michael will obviously be off in the Summer..after all who wants to stay and play for a club that will finish in the bottom 6!!!!

Now where’s that rope…??????

Johna
Photographs wanted . . . Submitted on 01/02/2006 by Stevie
Despite Mr Smith`s assertion that I am a 'lazy b*stard' I`m currently looking at implementing a new photos section. I`ve got most of the old site stuff, but if anyones got any Carrville Mags related photos, send them to me. Make sure you tell me any captions you want with them and a category for them. Make sure you compress them a bit. (Jpeg 50 is good). If you don`t know what that means, find someone who does before sending them.

You can email them by clicking here
 RESULT . . . Manchester City 3-0 Newcastle United     more . . . Submitted on 01/02/2006