Season 2006-07
November 2006 December 2006 January 2007
‘Match’ Reporting. Submitted on 31/12/2006 by ?
Any volunteers to join the rota for ‘match reports’?

Recently there’s been a problem getting some regulars to write a few lines for the web site. The fact that different people regularly write for this web site keeps it individual. In fact we’ve been complimented on how various different people’s views are regularly aired. This keeps our site interesting. It would be so easy to emulate some other mundane, Toon related web sites where one or two people control what is written. Anyway it’s as much about the pre-match, and post-match crack as the football. It’s an opportunity to have a rant, have a rave and have a go at a fellow Carrvillian.

The old chestnut: ‘I haven’t got the time’, is bollox. None of us really have the time particularly if only one or two people are involved, but if we have 10 or 11 volunteers then you only need to write a ‘report’ once every 10 or 11 games. The busiest man on earth could manage that!!!!!

Get your fingers out!

For the record, here’s a list of this seasons reporters:

Smike 6
Beat 3
Sean 2
Greavsie 2
Dirk 2
Passy 2
Trapper 2
John 1
Johna 1
Lee G. 1

There have been 12 games where there has been no ‘match report’ written.
For Sale Submitted on 31/12/2006 by ?
We have received a collection of Ferrer Rocher from an anonymous source. An unwanted Christmas Present that was discarded on Boxing Day I would imagine.
More here. . .
 RESULT . . . Everton 3-0 Newcastle United     more . . . Submitted on 31/12/2006
 RESULT . . . Bolton Wanderers 2-1 Newcastle United     more . . . Submitted on 31/12/2006
 MATCH REPORT . . . Newcastle United 3-1 Tottenham Hotspur Submitted on 31/12/2006 by ?
The attendance of 52,079 is the highest at SJP this season.

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 MATCH REPORT . . . Newcastle United 0-1 Chelsea Submitted on 31/12/2006 by ?
The crowd of 37,406 was a decent turnout given the ticket price (£20 adults, £10 bairns), proximity to Xmas, live TV transmission and baring in mind we’ve got 3 home games in a week.

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 MATCH REPORT . . . Newcastle United 2-1 Watford Submitted on 31/12/2006 by ?
4 mins into the second half, Milner received the ball down the right flank and with no preamble sent over a superlative cross for Martins to leap ahead of Chambers and powerfully flick-head past Lee at the Leazes End. 1-0.

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 MATCH REPORT . . . Blackburn Rovers 1-3 Newcastle United Submitted on 31/12/2006 by ?
On the ground where Alan Shearer built the reputation that ultimately persuaded us to part with £15m for him, his successor in Newcastle's number nine shirt enhanced his own standing with two well-taken goals.

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 MATCH REPORT . . . Eintracht Frankfurt 0-0 Newcastle United Submitted on 31/12/2006 by ?
The crowd was 47,000, with around 2,000 travelling fans in the East end of the ground on upper and lower levels, with those having purchased seats directly from the home club mixing freely with Frankfurt fans in adjacent areas.

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 MATCH REPORT . . . Newcastle United 2-1 Celta Vigo Submitted on 31/12/2006 by ?
25,079 is not quite the lowest of the season - 51 more than Pompey in the Carling Cup. After 5 European home games this season, our average attendance is 28,737.

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 MATCH REPORT . . . Watford 2-2 Newcastle United Submitted on 31/12/2006 by ?
At long last we've managed to win a competitive penalty shootout, our supporters and players at last being able to enact that special moment we've seen other sides enjoy, namely that of going collectively barmy at the precise moment the crucial penalty was scored - or in this case, saved.

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 MATCH REPORT . . . Palermo 0-1 Newcastle United Submitted on 31/12/2006 by ?
A half empty stadium meant that there weren’t many of the local Tifosi near enough to the 180 travelling punters who were caged into one corner.

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 MATCH REPORT . . . Liverpool 2-0 Newcastle United Submitted on 31/12/2006 by ?
Out of everything that went on here tonight, the moment that this game will forever be remembered for was almost the least important part of proceedings.

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 MATCH REPORT . . . Aston Villa 2-0 Newcastle United Submitted on 31/12/2006 by ?
The attendance was 35,141 - around 4,000 travelling fans including England bowler Steve Harmison.

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 MATCH REPORT . . . FK Ventspils 0-1 Newcastle United Submitted on 31/12/2006 by ?
This game was played at the Skonto Stadium, Riga.

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 MATCH REPORT . . . Lillestrøm 0-3 Newcastle United Submitted on 31/12/2006 by ?
Scandinavian based fans outnumbered travelling UK Mags by about ten to one. That resulted in a slightly Nordic pronunciation of the "United" chant, while hand claps greeted moments of Newcastle pressure. Toon fans found themselves in one single tier 2,000-capacity stand with some all-important shade on the rear half. In total there were 1,700 in the away end. A small police presence was relaxed in the extreme and seemed to have nothing to occupy them.

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 RESULT . . . Newcastle United 3-1 Tottenham Hotspur     more . . . Submitted on 24/12/2006
W*nkers! Submitted on 21/12/2006 by ?
 RESULT . . . Newcastle United 0-1 Chelsea     more . . . Submitted on 21/12/2006
Bolton Bus Boxing Day...... Submitted on 20/12/2006 by Smike
.......wil leave The Keys at 8.45am and then The Sporties shorlty after.
 RESULT . . . Newcastle United 2-1 Watford     more . . . Submitted on 16/12/2006
 MATCH REPORT . . . Newcastle United 1-0 Portsmouth Submitted on 16/12/2006 by Sean
Any Port………

Sunday 1.30pm, what a $hite time for a footy match!

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It’s Tank Tops for Boxing Day Submitted on 14/12/2006 by Smike
The bus for Bolton away on Boxing Day is now full and the pub is booked. For tickets check with you usual ticket supplier. The theme for the day is tank tops - just the job for a freezing cold Boxing Day!! There’ll be a prize for the best (or should that be worst) one.
 RESULT . . . Chelsea 1-0 Newcastle United     more . . . Submitted on 14/12/2006
Mackem scandal Submitted on 13/12/2006 by Intrepid Reporter
Following THE SUN's revelation this week about three sunderland players being involved in a videoed group sex scandal whilst being watched by two mates, we have carried out our own investigation using our contacts in the newspaper trade. (Sid the newsagent, there's not much gets past this nosey old ****).

The young "lady" involved denies that anything untoward actually took place, she said there is no way any of these three could perform in front of a crowd. Lawrence shot too early, had a little dribble, then got pulled off by the manager.Alnwick in true mackem tradition went down and never came back up. She denied knowing Brown, saying "I've never heard of him" The football world havn't heard of the other two either.
Korma you Faithful Submitted on 13/12/2006 by Beat
According to one of the reliable satellite TV listings, the Chelsea game is live on ART Sport 4. So this means that there should be somewhere local to watch it on Wednesday. There’s still some uncertainty over the legitimacy of showing ART channels in the UK. So……….

………it’s madras to think we’ll do anything but phall, but win, vindaloos or draw, pull on your bhaji trousers, miss the naan o’clock new, for what is bhuna be a long night.
 RESULT . . . Blackburn Rovers 1-3 Newcastle United     more . . . Submitted on 09/12/2006
 MATCH REPORT . . . Newcastle United 3-2 Reading Submitted on 09/12/2006 by Smike
All’s Well That Ends Well.
There’s a full team of players unavailable at the moment.

I was very disappointed to hear that Dyer wasn’t playing again as he’s made such a difference lately and it’s no coincidence that our form has improved since he’s returned.

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 RESULT . . . Newcastle United 3-2 Reading     more . . . Submitted on 06/12/2006
Yeeeeeeeeeehaaargh!!! Submitted on 03/12/2006 by Smike
Stiff Little Fingers are playing Newcastle Carling Academy on Sunday 18th March 2007.
 RESULT . . . Eintracht Frankfurt 0-0 Newcastle United     more . . . Submitted on 01/12/2006
DVD Club Submitted on 01/12/2006 by ?
“One of these blokes wants to discourage Sherburn kids from drinking cheap Lambrini, the other is in Spain stocking up.”